Yesterday

Yesterday was my birthday. A reminder of how many years have passed and how drastically my world has changed and how many dreams are still longing to be filled. But birthdays mean hearing from all levels of friends and family. Celebrating another year of growth and accomplishments. And being spoiled.

I woke up to a text from my far away dad and a call from my dear grandmother, as well as many warm birthday greetings on Facebook. My husband tried really hard to get our daughter to wish me a happy birthday. She only responded with her cute little squint that represents a hug with her eyes. Good enough, sweet heart. You spoil me with your love. By the end of the day she did say "good day".

Unbeknownst to her, she did grant me a very special gift. When I picked her up after work I noticed that her day outside was starting her very first freckles. So adorable! Since she has been born she has been daddy's mini-me with her orange hair and long torso and expressions. Everyone points out her likeness. If people see me with her and have never met her dad they claim we look alike. But if they know her dad they would never have to guess who she belongs to! Now, happy birthday mommy, she is getting your freckles (never mind the fact that daddy does have some too).

We had started my birthday with a playful walk with the dogs. It included the typical, "Buddy, come here!" Each walk is either training him to heal on leash or training him to stay with me off leash. I took some beautiful pictures as the sun magically shone through the forest trees. Such a glorious morning, in spite of my lingering grumpiness. It was a pleasant walk until my daughter and her female canine companion fought over a stick, a common occurrence for the two of them. When the dog won, as she always does, I told my girl to just grab another. We were surrounded by them. But they weren't the one she wanted.

As for the rest of the day, I worked. Tired and not feeling the best. Then a family dinner with my step-daughter who thankfully returned safely from a long drive. Then clean up. Birthdays don't stop laundry and dishes from needing to be done.

If I were to ask for anything else for my birthday it wouldn't be anything material. Not that I couldn't think of a few ideas. But I won't share them. This isn't a hinting blog.

What I could use is a fairy. Maybe a cleaning fairy eager to thoroughly wash my always dirty floor each night while I walk the dogs or cuddle with my girl. Or an organizing fairy to get the garage cleaned up and find an easy to access place for seasonal items. Or, maybe I just need a kick-in-the-ass fairy to remind me to stay on task. It seems I always have an interminable list until opportunity arises and then I no longer see anything as pressing enough to get to. It's funny how priorities change moment to moment.

Realistically, I wont get a fairy and I don't think telling me to smarten up would be an adequate gift for this special occasion. I would love a family (and friend) gathering. Grandmas and grandpas, uncles and aunts, cousins and brothers and sisters. Sitting around and talking with no pressing agenda. Playing some board games. Looking through photos and taking new ones. Reminiscing and laughing. That would be a great day. If money was unlimited I would fly everyone out here for a weekend. Or maybe rent a few cabins on a lake. Do a little boating and barbecuing.

I somewhat get my wish as in two days I have some family company with their five year old and 3 1/2 month old. We will get together at grandma and grandpa's house. It will be loud with all the children running around. My daughter will have so much fun. We have walked by grandpa's a few times and she has requested, "Papa, papa". But they have been away.

In preparation I should probably treat myself to a longer night's sleep. I never get as much as I should and yesterday I really felt the heaviness. I'm getting older. I should take better care of myself. My concentration would greatly improve. And so would my appreciation for things like birthdays.